humans,

its hard to describe ur feelings, or emotions, when they are mix and no words can possibly explain them.

to those who have lost sum1 you love, then u alrdy noe hw it feels. to others, u guys cant possibly imagine it...

dedicated to the ones who experienced heartbreak:
heres a short note( i had enuff of poem writtings )
hmm. lets back track. to the place. the time. the moment. u met that sum1 special.
feel the magic. yesh. definately. its magic.
all is quiet. everything is calm. peaceful. its beautiful.
fireworks. silent lights. gentle music.
you've reached a magical world.

well. once in a while, a magic has to stop. they run out. tinkerbell's fairy powder dun last
slowly, the magic dies off.
we muz be prepared. good things have to come to an end. so better thigns may come along...

then the clock strucks 12. and the magic totally evaporated. ur left with ur only pair of glass shoes. ur memories. nth else.

let it go darlings. ur prince charming will come knocking on ur door. he'll put on those beautiful shoes on u again. you will dance ur new chapter away in an enchanted world if only u dare to trust again.

my gurls out there. love is a cycle. it revolves. when ur guy changes heart, let him go. becuse ur prince hasnt arrive yet...

ironically, i think mine left.

i nv avoid u!!

daryl i relai nv avoid u. i juz wnana study for my mid years.. haix.

nvm abt this.. u get well soon.

to my dear frien, sophi

darling, u know who u are. and this is for u =)

THERE.

in times of darkness
i will be there for u
when u feel hopeless
i will make ur world new

i know wad u've been through
and i am here to share it with you
becuse i understand hw u feel too
no matter wad,dun waste ur youth

dun let those tears drop.
u know there are nt worth it
i will alwyas be here to pull ur rope
making sure u wun fall into any pit

ur frineds all standing by for you
you are not alone for we are here
take our hands and start anew
and our happy voices u may hear

cherish every moment, every breath
for life is not juz about sad heartbreaks
no matter wad we wun go away
because we know u are whom we care

love u, sop. =)

Don't

wad's a poem. when there's no rhyme?
wad's a letter. when there's no words?
wad's a book. when there's no story?

wad's life... when there's no U?

dont walk out on me.
i've lost too much.
looks. strength. confidence.

don't leave me alone
i've been too long in the dark.
nights. moon. stars.

don't throw me behind.
i've struggled a long way
stumble. fell.hurted

don't let me walk alone
i've traveled far enough
emptiness.confussion.lost

don't let go of me
i've been left unnoticed
loneliness.terrified.numb

don't give up on me
i've longed to have hopes
me.myself.i.

don't let me pass you by
i've needed u by my side
you. you. you.

Heal

always the healer
i tot i was invincible
now i know im no better
seeing that its impossible

despite the power
i know that i cant have everything
my heart turned into powder
now i cant even think

im not allowing myself to cry
im not allowling myself to feel sad
all tears will dry
no more of feeling shag

wads so good about a jerk?
when he lied about eternality
will my voices be heard?
common, its pure stupidity

im healing up, im healing fast
no use wasting time
let all feelings be crushed
squeeze the juices outta lime

time to let go, time to open up
all these memories shall be yet, well kept
while heart still beat with "Dub"
the love shall no longer wept

learn to move on, learn to take it
who is he to destroy me?
i shall continue to feed
and stun him the next time we meet

makes sure he regrets, make sure he cries
"pls come back to me"
"oh hell no chance, u and ur lies!!"
no doors bwtween us, weee!

to my lil boy and madeliane

its you,
who brighten my life
and straighten all the lies
who lifted my soul
and help me achieve my goals

its you,
who brought the stars
and undo my scars
who exchange all my woes
and rid all my foes

with you,
my days lightens
and then my face brightens
my voice rejoices
and then my heart rejoins

with you,
all sadness is cleared
as all happiness is earned
all sorrows are washed
as all misery are squashed

so now,
lets make a pact
that we will never be apart
i shall support you
when ever u have no clue

so now,
we shall be friends forever
until lifes and after
no matter wad happenes
our hearts will be open

love u both so much =)

to daryl =)

you stood me up
you held me tight
you gave me guts
you tried all ur might

i duno wad will happen
i duno hw long i will take
will my heart ever be opened?
its not a piece of cake

i feel your burning love,
i dun have to be warned
like putting on gloves
i will alwyas be warmed

u make me feel secure
and make loving not so hard
its reali the perfect cure
for my small little broken heart

you've protected me all along
sheilding me from all harm
never leaving me alone
you kept me reali calm

though i have no clue
if u are meant for me
but i reali muz thank you
for giving me sweet memories

wad ever the future beholds
even if it means that we have to be friends
i hope that we will still be close
even if nothing goes according to plan

thanks daryl =)

his name is nelson

To HIM.

3 years with you,
i tot we would last forever
but i had no clue
that we will break up in october

i loved you so
yet u wanted fresher
u let me go
as if she was much better

i held on tight
not wanting to regret
all these sleepless nights
i will never forget

wad about the "forevers"
those that u used to mention
are they juz some flavours
or juz any other medicine?

he said u never wanna be like HIM
who treated HER like shit they slept
but now u have to say ur hymm,
as you are following his footsteps

all these memories
are they juz for ur fun?
u change ur taste to maggie?
or rather sum bun?

you know how much u have hurted me
you know these wounds will never heal
dun take it like you're drinking tea
or juz having another meal

leave me alone
and dun ever come back
becuse you are a morron
and deserve some slaps

JARLZ

woo hoo. wad a day with JARL. ahha. i miss them so much. la looks so cute with that super short hair and everyone else look so sweet too.. aiyah i think i juz miss them too much la. i bought Madalaine to meet them cuz i wan her to meet jarls lol... maybe she can be happier knowing them..

o ya, MAD came to stay with me last nite lol.. jielun too ahahx. they both ah.. snatch 2 beds away(one each) and leave me with nth... slept at 4, woke up at 430, and then 5 and then 530 then 6 then 630.. then 7 i finally decided nt to sleep anymore,. so yesh, i look like a freaking panda now.

so glad mad and jielun were there for me.. i noe i shouldnt think of him so much since he can like forget 3 years of relations.. he so cruel.. say change then change.. why he can move on so quickly and i cant? it was juz 2 weeks ago that he said he love me. see the sudden changE?

ive been thinking of all my friends, they are all so nice to be with me and care of me.. its like friends from all over come and support me lo.. so touched lol. anyway, point is, now that he says he loves another gurl, there's nth else that is holding me back already lo. last time i die die muz hold on cuz i tot if i dun salvage this relation i'll regret.. but now i think i wun la.. it slike.. he reali change laio isnt it.. then wad can i do? i was thinking maybe 5 years down we'll get back toegethr? but that only happen in fairytales or korean drama la. so, why wait?

right now, i kno wi have to move on and continue with my studies.. i pray to my Gods that they will give me strength and will to go on with my life...

i must achieve my goals.. o levels was screwed cuz of him.. not A LVL THIS TIME.. i should take this time to heal, rather than to fight...

i guess all guys are like that? that can promise u the world and its actually juz coaxing u cuz they sweet talk ma.. after they play enuff with u laio they juz change target? ahah or its juz that i dun understand guys enuff ba. ahahx who cares anyway.

right now i need to live my life to the fullest. he there so happi with her i here wanan die for wad? i was too stupid for the past 2 weeks la ahahx. now i lost my nice eyes.. and my energy.. muzz quickly get them back ya? ahahx.

THANK YOU

note of appreciation:

thanks janine, for lending me ur shoulders even when its already going 12am....

thanks Joel for telling me that hes nt the one.
thanks Abriel, for talking me outta dying.
thanks Ronald for awakening me with ur words.
thanks Larissa, for msging me all these times to ask me to focus on my studies.

thanks hainita for standing by me all along

thanks nick wong, for calling me late at nite to calm me down.. and making me feel wanted..

thanks nick loy, my da jie.. for telling me hw loved i am.... =)

thanks joce for telling me ur there for me...

thanks becca for standing by me....

thanks jolynn for telling me hes nt worth it..

thanks aaron, for that chocolate cake when i had gastric ulcer..

thanks daryl, for stanidng by me and understanding me all these times.

thanks sam for comign to visit my sister, using me as an excuse

thanks jierong, my lil boy, for rushing to me once u noe i need sum1.

thanks madeleine, for rushing to me too, when i told u i wanted u by my side

thanks joanna, for asking so many ppl to take care of me..

thanks jazreel, for telling ur gurls to side me and even wanna fight him for me

thanks jaz's friends, for siding me lol

thanks jie lun, for making me realise that i dint lose to her.

thanks tracy, for being with me when i had gastric ulcer

thanks melissa, for supporting me all these times

thanks bingliang, for saying that i win her in ever aspect

thanks lou jun for trying to cheer me up by wanting to play bball with me.

thanks zhao yong for telling me i deserve better =)

thanks 6030, for being with me everyday in sch...

thanks GERVIN, for giving me STRENGTH

thanks JOLENE, for helping me scold him lol

thanks MUMMY, for taking 3 days off from ur shop jzu to cook nice soup for me..

thanks DADDY, for taking 3 days off to make sure i made it through.

thanks COUSINS ( JIN QUAN AND JIN CHENG) for guilding me along..

thanks all my bball friends in nyjc, for telling me there are better tress out there..

my god.. so many ppl mroe to thank.. aiyah.. thanks everyone else kk ahh =)
ppl.. thanks u so much for making my life worthwhile.. for making me realise death is no way out ... and that hes nt worth dying for=) i love u guys!!

ahh..

ahah. a week of gastric ulcer. IS IT WORTH IT?
so many post on my walls:
-WILL POWER ZOE

-GET OVER IT

-HES A JERK

-BE STRONG

ya i tink i come to realise.. while he's happily enjoyign his time with that gurl.. im suffering here.. llike who cares rite? i should be happi too and relai let him go...
but hw the heck do i move on? hw does he make it so easy?

why are we.. strangers when.. our loves so strong.. why carry on without me?

bahs. no use. hes nv gonna come back and i gotta focus my thoughts on sth else. so glad i have friends to support me... so many time si tot abt commiting suicide.. lucky my parents took 3 days off to stay by my side... lucky i got firneds to keep me going on.. if nt i wunldnt know hw to carry on with my life.

i suck. im so cheap.. why i wan a jerk? ugh. hate myself. ahhax. nvm. i'll get over it. i guess.

right now, i muz live on ya? ahahx..

PLs dun cry, sweets

daryl.. im so sorry i hurted u again and again.. but may i pls seek ur understanding that im hurt too.. i cant control my feelings... i know alot of things i should nt let u know.. but i have to say them i have to tell u...i need u to know..

u aree so miserable becuse i dun love u back... thus our relationship canot worked out. we should back track all the way to the time when we 1st met.. i dun wanan accept u juz becuse i wanan forget him.. i dun wanan make use of u.. although u insist, but its wrong.. we should stop all of these..

whether i can giv up on him or nt, it all depends on me. yes he loves another gurl now.. i should die heart on him, but i reali wanan be single ... i dun wanan be attached already. daryl, its so tiring. i know u may be crying now, and i know u cried many times b4... i am so appreciative of these precious tears u've shed for me.. im so fortunate to have met u in my life.. but pls.. give me sum space.. give me sum time... pls.. i NEED to get over him, and i wanan DO IT ALONE. i hope u understands, daryl...

i believe that if true love exsist, it'l come back.. daryl... i dun wanan u to be sad, though i know the only way for u to be happi is that i love u.. but right now, i cant.. i reeali tried my best. cant force it... i can only say thank you again and again... ur love made my days pass faster... and all the help u gave.. im reali so appreciative of it..

we can start off as firneds again? we can, and we will make the best outta any relations we are in, wun we? daryl... i need this space and time.. pls give it to me...